Non-judgmental listening has to do with not judging or criticizing the other person. That is, you just listen to someone and receive what they are saying because, in this way, you let the speaker feel heard and valued. In this article, we are going to discuss the ways you can acquire this skill so you can be a non-judgmental listener for those around you and communicate better. Read on to get familiar with these ways.
When we sit down to listen to someone who thinks s/he needs to talk to us, we need to keep listening. Moreover, it is not enough to be silent; Everyone who sits in front of us wants to see our reaction regarding what they say. This reaction comes from our eagerness to listen to what they tell us.
Make eye contact
Looking into the eyes of the person who is talking to us represents that his/her words are important for us. However, if we constantly look around or watch a program on TV rather than making eye contact with him/her, it shows that his/her words are insignificant for us.
Confirm his/her words with your head constantly
Confirmation of the words with your head is a sign of attention and approval of his/her words. In fact, when you hear the words well and understand them, you can confirm them.
React emotionally to important words
Showing emotional reactions is actually your real feelings from what s/he says. Instead of a being good listener, you can recognize every emotion you get from him/her and don’t be afraid to react to them. We smile, we hate and we can cry in complete honesty with the one who is talking. (To read more see how to be a good listener in a relationship.)
Adopt an attitude of empathy
Holding your friend’s hands while listening to their words conveys a sense of security and confidence to him/her. Further, you can take the time to imagine yourself in your friend’s place can help you be more empathic.
Mind cultural differences
If you are listening to someone with a different cultural background, you may need to seek advice from someone who has the same cultural background. In doing so, you will have no difficulty talking about what is culturally appropriate while you are talking to someone with a different culture.
Genuineness refers to accepting the person who is talking to you and his/her values by what you say. Nevertheless, you should be careful not to make moral judgments about their situation.
If you are in the role of a non-judgmental listener, the important principle in this story is to be reliable. Try not to pass on information to others. Non-judgmental listeners should be confidential, and by trusting them you can express yourself.
Use verbal skills
Some verbal skills will help you show someone that you’re listening to him/her. Using verbal skills has to do with asking questions, listening to his/her tone of voice and nonverbal cues being used, using such minimal prompts as “I see” and “ah” won’t interrupt the one who is talking to you and s/he can easily express his/her thoughts and feelings.
Do not judge
In fact, no one seeks judgment when they are talking. By judging, you will make them reticent. Sometimes people just want to be heard, not judged or instructed by the other person. Hence, you should reflect on your own state of mind to make sure you are feeling calm, open, and ready to listen to your peer in need. (To learn more see how to communicate effectively in a relationship.)